Bowling Rules & Etiquette
- The league will accept you without your trendy gear. Before taking to the lanes, trade in your New Balance sneakers for a pair of clown shoes like everyone else.
- Keep up the pace of play. This means: don’t make phone calls when it’s your turn to roll, and don't make your team wait while you hit on the 1L on the lane next to you. If she likes you, she'll be there when you get back. If she's not, take a hint, loser.
- Every lane has a foul line capable of electric shock if a bowler encroaches. While we have not yet felt the need to activate these foul lines, we’ll turn you into toast if you insist on using the lane as a Slip N’ Slide.
- Chivalry may be dead, but it had a little-known illegitimate child: The rule that you should wait to step onto the lane until the bowler next to you has finished rolling.
- The only acceptable reason for bringing a casebook to the lanes is to use it to bludgeon someone else who is reading at the alley.
- When you're done playing with your balls, please put them away. (No need to polish them.)
- Beer Frames & the Fence: One of the crowning achievements in bowling is the Fence. The Fence occurs when everyone on a team strikes, creating a beautiful X - X - X - X pattern from top to bottom. The Beer Frame is invoked as a punishment when three bowlers on a team roll strikes and the other bowler flops. The person responsible for creating the hideous X - X - 9/ - X pattern must buy beer for his teammates.
- You have to pay ten bucks to the league each week, regardless of whether or not you bowl. If it seems like a lot, recognize that after you graduate, you'll probably make that much money in the time it takes you to order your third venti double chai soy skinny caramel macchiato of the day.
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